When the fiance and I decided to elope we did it with blinders on. All we could see was the vision of the two of us in some tropical location finally getting to tie the knot. It seemed perfect and all of the traditional wedding day stress just melted away. ...and then we told people.
I know you're thinking, who the heck tells people that they're eloping? I mean, by definition the very word means, "to run off and get married". All I can say is, I blame the blinders! I was sure that, given my complete inability to make wedding plans so far, everyone would be happy for us. I imagined that if I just planned to include everyone in a reception style party, that everything would be okay. Not so much!
As the news started to break about my impending elopement, I've been hit with a lot of different opinions. There have been some people who are happy for us and see it as super romantic, and then there are those who feel hurt.
(Something you should know about me, I hate it when people are upset with me. I mean, I REALLY hate it. I'm talking nightmares, loss of appetite, the whole thing. It's not good.)
After obsessing over a few different naysayer's concerns... I still totally want to do it!
Let me break down my pros list for you...
1. The fiance and I are way more excited about our day when we talk about eloping. There's less stress, less pressure, and I feel like there's room for more creative freedoms.
2. I'd get more one on one time with my new husband!
3. I know Tony and I will be able to completely focused on each other during our vows and we'll be comfortable enough to say what we really want to say. (This ones a biggie because the ceremony is the most important part to me.)
4. LESS FAMILY DRAMA.
5. I know that those who feel hurt only feel that way because they love us. While I do wish they could be with us, I worry that if they are, I'm going to feel spread thin and a little overwhelmed. That's really not what I want on our wedding day. We do plan to find a special way to celebrate with them and I hope that they'll be happy for us because this is what we really want.
I feel so bad that this would cause any of my loved ones pain. That is obviously not my intention here. The plan is simply to start my marriage with my long time best friend. The truth is, I've fought the want to elope for a long time for fear of upsetting people or missing out on certain traditions. However, now that I think back, I see that I'm just not a traditional bride and that's okay! In light of all that, this is something we just have to do for us and hope everyone will understand.
The lesson I learned here is - eloping is really NOT easier than having a traditional wedding. It's just a different kind of stress. At the end of the day though, as long as you end up married, I think it's totally worth it!