This week I'm feeling especially thankful. My bachelorette was last weekend and it was so amazing to be surrounded by my best friends. It got me thinking about giving thanks...and about thank you cards!
With the wedding quickly approaching and bridal showers along the way, I wanted to know the 'etiquette' of sending thank you notes.
Source: above designs
So, here you have my quick guide to all you could wonder about giving thanks (along with some personal commentary):
Who gets thank you notes:
- Anyone who gives you a gift, whether it be physical or monetary. This includes a gift at any of the parties on your behalf: engagement, shower, and the wedding
- Anyone who hosts a party for you
- Vendors who go above and beyond - this one, I think, is totally up to you and optional
When should it be sent:
- I remembered hearing a year from your wedding date, but most sources I found said they should be sent by 1-3 months after the honeymoon or as soon as possible. Keep in mind that people will worry that you didn't get the gift if they don't get your thank you. If you get gifts before the wedding, try to get them out right away (aka before the wedding). But don't beat yourself up about the deadlines of when to send thanks. It's always better late than never. I love all the customized thank you notes with wedding pictures, but it makes me think those notes would be sent very late if you were waiting on the photographer's images. Either that or the photographer and bride and groom are just really on top of it!
- Get your groom to help you - especially for notes to his side of the family and friends. Quick tip on this - as responsible as our guys are, make sure he actually sends them and you don't find the blank cards months later :-)
What to say:
- Be personal and genuine. If the thank you is sent after the wedding, add a personal note about them being at the wedding. There are lots of sample wordings online if you get stuck or feel like you're repeating yourself a million times.
- If you receive a monetary gift, sources say to mention what you plan to use the money for. You don't need to mention the amount.
Buying the thank you's:
- Consider the number of invitations you used - this should end up being about the equivalent of gifts you receive. Then make sure to account for your shower and any other parties where people might bring a gift. I decided to get a small batch of cards of a different design for the shower because I didn't want people getting the same card twice (although I don't think that's a 'rule' by any means).
- There are a ton of places online to get inexpensive thank you cards. I chose to have my designer create a simple design that went with our invitations.
- Most sources say thank yous must be hand written and I tend to agree with this. It is extra special, especially these days, to receive mail that isn't junk. It doesn't matter if you don't like you're handwriting or can't splurge on pricey paper - your guests will love to get something that was written by you.
How to keep track of it all:
- Keep the excel or document you used for the addresses and add a column or spreadsheet showing what each guest gave you. This way you have it all in one place, along with everyone's address. Add another column indicating whether the thank you has been sent yet.
Happy writing and thank you for reading! :-)